Random fact

cute girl that i've never met before: "you are really nice you know"

me: "na, i've never heard it before." hehe..(imaginatory)

me (in real situation): "yeah, some of my friend told me the same thing." (dalam hati: what for an answer is this!! omg, the answer is very nerd).

better prepare myself better next time.

acquaintances

i can't help but keep thinking that everybody just looking for me and write to me if they need something from me and then dissapeared after it is done.
but i was wrong. its actually my fault. i should also have to look for the others if i need help from them. and it's my fault that i don't need anything just yet.
09.05.14 Andy. *enlightment after this long time*
ain't i happy? hey, i am not sad, and then that means i am happy now rite?

is it  the true difference between friends and acquaintances? am i really that lonely if nobody has asked me hi, how are you? what have you been doing? never heard about you anymore. am worried sick about you.  but instead of that i just got messages about: hey, is it true? i want your confirmation about this, is that person really went back for good already? am i a reporter?
what about a simple how are you? you are too busy too even remember that huh

found you?

dunno if it's right to post it out here but i don't know how to deal with this. there wont be many people reading this anyway. Maybe after writing it down i will know what to do afterwards.

huff.. mm.. how to begin? ok, there is this girl that i think might have a crush on me. shocking isn't it? haha..

how do i know you asked? well, my memories isn't always very good. but i have told some of my friend about every of her behaviour for a while and all of the male and female friends concluded that she is indeed into me. well she may has showed many signals for me like for example she shared what her interests and what she likes with me, she asked me out to cinema everytime she was free, she came to my place and cooked for me without any real reason. she just came by as she likes i think. ok enough about that.

The real problem is, she is actually not bad. she's attractive, smart, and our conversations connects. I told a friend of mine a few days back that i think i should try to ask her directly, and bcoz she is too shy i might make a first move to see if we match each other. but my friend forbade me and said she is not a really good choice and mentioned that there are many better girl out there. this is because sometimes i asked him for advice and he also knew some of her bad characters that i told him before. she is kinda bossy and getting angry easily. 

so, it was last week that she said she want to come to my place and asked if i have tried her fried sesame rice. and i said i wasnt in berlin and wont come back until monday afternoon and then she said she will come on tuesday. So, it was tuesday yesterday and she did come. I don't know if i watched too much movie or drama, if i am not wrong it is said that if you really like someone, your heart will either skip a beat or beats faster. But i realize i didn't feel anything like that nor i missed her.

Haiz, am i just a newbee in a relationship? do i need to feel that kind of sensation first to be sure?

i know some of my female friend who rejected some guys because they say they dont feel anything toward them. But there are also girls that didn't feel anything at first but madly in love after accepted the guy. (in my culture there are rarely any girl confessed to a guy first).

Now you know my problem. I dont know what to do, should i keep my heart closed to her at all or just see where this is going.

Ignorant

Am not sure if i ve used this title here before. But that aside, i have never been more ashamed of myself before today. I did a verbal exam today and it was a part of my last few big important subject in all my school years. Some exams are only available on verbal terms and not always a written test. And as you knew, i´ve been studying food technology and somehow, i think i don´t have a tiny bit interest of any subjects that are related to it other than the stuff i must read on school textbook. Simply said it was not really my passion.

But that is where my ignorance coming back at me today. How could it be that a student who has been studying about food and also its molecular composition
couldn´t answer a really simple question that asked by the prof. I´ve been preparing for the exams for almost a month intensively, studied a lot of the "more complicated" stuff on textbook, but i couldn´t answer a few simple "a-must-know" question. I was really being ignorant, and it really hurt my pride to looking for answer in prof´s eyes. I believe i'll be too ashamed to ever meet the prof again.

How come i can´t figure out what our body does to salt, as which organ is responsible to break it. And not just that, i simply forgot what i learned in the beginning first few semesters as i can´t recall how the chemistry compound of protein looks like and which groups are responsible for its bonding ability. Yeah, this was not a exam for food chemistry, but the question is somehow significant to the subject that being examined (true, all things that can be defined as food is all significant to all our subjects ^^). I expected that the prof would ask more to the class related topic. I´m sure the prof never met someone like me who has no passion in his own field of study. If i were him, i am sure that i must be failed at today´s exam. I don´t deserve the
B− mark at all. Oh, look at the time. I haven´t been asleep for 34 hours now, how come i don´t feel that sleepy at all.

I just wanna be your friend.

People change

I was in the kitchen of our dorm earlier. and saw a neighbour friend and talk a bit and then...


Me: explaining what i was doing for the last hour that i was slicing potatoes in my room to make some chips

Girl: you know that you are very funny?

Me: no, i am not funny (it has been long that someone said that to me)

Girl: yes, you are, you are always an interesting dude

Me: ... Danke (you made my day)

am i boasting right now? nope, not really. it´s just that has been really really long time since someone said those words to me. As far as i can remember i was really a humorous kid back then in my junior high in aceh, my hometown. I told people many jokes at class and also on the way home. people always laugh at my new fresh jokes everyday. But i think everything started to change after i moved to medan to continue my study. I became a serious kid and rarely talk in the class. And now, if you ask my friend or people who know me in this city, funny or interesting are far off to describe me. I am sure they would use another characteristic to remember me well. But i really want to be remembered as a funny interesting guy badly now. hahaha.. Can i go back to the one i used to be?